Reflections about Family

Carol A. Hand

If you can’t say something kind
Don’t say anything at all
It’s the thought that comes to mind
As I greet this grey morning in fall

The message light on my phone
Is still blinking, signaling your call
I’m sad to admit I wish to be alone
I prefer to simply be free once and for all

Free from the fiction of family ties
Free from reliving years of abuse
Free from survivors’ guilt and lies
Listening to history revised is of little use

There are so many truths I cannot share
Probably you were too drunk to recall
You set me up for beatings without a care
I still bear visible scars from it all

me age 8

I forgave you many many years ago
And although I can feel your pain
I can’t forget the violence, you know
I don’t have to tolerate it again

I hope you find internal peace
It’s not in my power to give
I suspect the only real release
Comes from choosing how we live

Honestly I wish you well
There’s nothing else I have to say
Choosing to be kind tempers my words
So I won’t call you back today

Copyright Notice: © Carol A. Hand and carolahand, 2013-2016. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Carol A. Hand and carolahand with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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15 thoughts on “Reflections about Family”

    1. I appreciate your very thoughtful comments, Rosaliene. This was a difficult decision for me to make. The poem seemed important as a way of making peace with my choice, but I had second thoughts about sharing it. Your comments helped me feel it was appropriate to share it. Thank you!

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Bless you, Carol. I’m so sorry this was ever part of your reality. And I would have done the same thing you did, just not pick up the phone. We are asked to forgive the faults of others, but we are not asked to subject ourselves to abuse from them. Love and hugs, Natalie 🙂 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Of all the heart-breaking experiences people around the world have had to deal with, those where innocent children suffer are impossible to explain and most spiritually frustrating. All will learn the answers to such mind-numbing questions upon leaving this Earth, but it seems clear the only chance for reducing the instances of innocents’ suffering lies in a world-encompassing spiritual evolution.

    Liked by 1 person

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