Yesterday, my blog turned four years old. I still wonder what led me to blogging. Initially I thought it was the stockpile of unpublished reflections and stories I wanted to share. They were stories based on a particular perspective as an outsider who wasn’t content with merely pointing out injustice and oppression. My work has always involved trying to solve puzzles and experiment with possible constructive solutions from a critical view. It seemed fitting to name my blog Voices from the Margins.
After a couple years, though, I ran out of those old reflections. So I began to experiment with different topics and ways to write. I also learned a little bit about photography using my old digital cameras. I kept blogging because of the dear friends I met here in the blogosphere. Although few of my original friends still blog, new friends have filled the void.
I have no illusions that my photos or blog posts are great works of art. But I do have fun creating them and sharing them with others.
On this anniversary, I wondered what comes next. I find myself re-engaging with the world a little more and taking on long-ignored home repair projects. The title of the blog still holds true, but perhaps the blurb about my blog needs a bit of updating. There are all kinds of issues I could write about from a critical frame, but so many others do that far better. What is less common are those who look both critically and gratefully at what is and ask how this informs practical everyday choices.
Increasingly, my posts are deliberately a little like the bright moon on a dark night peeking through tree branches. Reflected light that flows through me, meant to provide solace and encourage creative, peaceful, constructive, thoughts and actions in a time of darkness.
These days, though, like the moon, my presence is not always visible. I am woefully behind replying to comments and reciprocating visits to other’s blogs. I apologize. I will try to do a better job because your friendship and what you share matters. I am always touched by the work you do.
But I do become micro-focused, like yesterday, when I had intended to share this post and visit blogs. I became so intent on finishing my newest project, sanding an old window frame, that I failed to stop and see the beauty of the day. I only saw the birch tree lit by the sun in a clear blue sky after I took a photo to record my progress.
Today, I will take time to thank you all for being an important presence in my life.
Please excuse me for belated responses to comments and visits to your blogs. These days, I am literally stretching to address long needed practical tasks. Some things I can do myself with the right tools – a higher light-weight ladder that fits into tiny spaces, caulk, spackle, a power drill, a Japanese handsaw, and paint. In the process, though, I have to live with messes again.
When I moved into my small fixer-upper house seven years ago, I had two days to clean up incredible messes before all of my stuff arrived. In that time I had to scrub, remove rotting, moldy rugs, and paint the floors and walls while I could. Needless to say, I didn’t sleep much those days, nor during the cold winter months that followed. Boxes and furniture were solidly stacked to the ceiling in the little living/dining room downstairs. It took me many months to finish as best I could. Then, there was outside work to do.
I haven’t been eager to take on what still needs to be fixed. So I have simply lived with it. Until now.
You may guess that I’m a rather small woman, so I really do need to stretch. I can’t afford to pay “handymen” to do the things I can do myself. So here I am, balancing on a ladder and in life. When I’m not working on scraping and painting, or spending time with my lovely daughter and grandchildren, I’m trying to keep up with the class I co-teach.
At the moment, I’m thinly stretched. Please know that I value your friendship, thoughtful comments, and the important work you all do. I will visit and respond to comments when I can. In the meantime, I want to thank everyone who has been engaging with each other in dialogue about the issue of garbage, my recent post. Chi miigwetch for your understanding and patience.
when I’m reading, watching Netflix, or typing away
without warning my computer screen turns black
“Oh crap,” I mutter to myself, “Windows 10 is back”
Urgent daily updates? Perhaps it’s just incompetence
exposing gaps between human and artificial intelligence?
Or perhaps it’s an intentional creative-flow-disrupting annoyance
making it quite clear I’m subject to a machine’s chaotic dominance?
At times like these
I wish I knew computerese
This poem isn’t typical for me, so it sat among the many reflections that never make it to my blog. It would have remained there, I suspect, until I discovered that the software for one of my cameras magically disappeared in a recent update. After reloading the software yesterday, my screen went blank for the second time in the day. Perhaps the software disappeared in the update, again, but I really don’t need to check. Ever curious and resilient, I discovered another way to save photos from that camera.
Ultimately, I realize that I am grateful to Windows 10 for making me rewrite things that were still in process and for providing me with puzzles to solve. I’m not sure that is the intended purpose of random intrusions, or even if there are any conscious intentions behind inconvenient disruptions other than artificial unintelligent mechanical programming.